Overcoming my fears of needles...

I scrambled off my bed this morning at 9:00a.m. sharp upon realising that I'm late for my appointment at a clinic for my bloodtest. Yeah, yeah... it's supposed to be an annual affair, but I've skipped it last year.

My brother, who booked the appointment for both his girlie and myself at the clinic obediently drove us to this health clinic... and there were tons of people there in line, all wanting to do exactly the same thing --> take their bloodtest.

Shanice (bro's girlie) went in first, and she came out having this really 'pained look on her face'. I swore she looked a teeny weeny bit 'greenish' on the face as she's frightened of needles too. Soon, my name is called, yes... it's my turn. I walked into the cold room, feeling all jittery, thinking of the needle and my past experience more than 18 years ago where a nurse at the government hospital poked my arm several times but failed to draw a drop of blood (I was suspected of having diabetes then, and to make sure that I'm clear I had to take the blood test). In her failure to draw my blood, she said this to me, "Young lady, you appear 'veinless', you must have never done any hard work of carried any heavy things before in your life". I was too young and stupid then to disagree with her, and to tell the truth, she made the wrong assumptions then... My mom has the same prob, and guess who I took after? Yeah, mommy dearest. In the end, after at least 7 attempts at poking into my arm painfully, the silly nurse gave up and decided to draw the needed tube of blood from the back of my palm which is a double 'ouch'... I still have that little scar at the back of my palm to this day.

So, here I am, 18 years later, filled with my vivid memory of the past, I looked at the middle-aged lady, who is all smiles and holding a cotton swab with one hand and also a syringe ready to go for my arm. This time, I spoke up and told her, "Look, nobody can find my veins, so make sure that you show me where my vein is before you put the syringe in". The lady quickly replied without missing a beat, "ok, let me see, I'm sure I can find it". There she went, kept on slapping my arm (poor arm!!) till it was all red and angry looking... but still, no vein is visible... and she started to press her thumb over that poor patch of red skin, trying to feel all over the inside of my elbow and said, "I can feel the vein, but I can't see it, let's give it a try". I nodded, and quickly looked away. Those were the longest moments of my life... my knees were buckling, going all soft and at the same time, I'm going a little faintish.

I blinked several times, thinking how pathetic I am at this age, and still so frightened of syringes. Soon after that, I felt the needle poking in, and there was quite a bit of pain and numbness going on there, and I'm not sure whether it's psychological or whatever, but I'm about to bolt out of the clinic. Before I knew it, she said, "Now, relax, we're almost done", and soonish after that, I felt the cold swab of the cotton. I bent my arm, and looked back at the lady, and she's still all smiles and said, "Now that's not so bad, isn't it?". I felt such a great relief washing over me... and said my little polite thank you with a smile and walked out with my arm bent and skipped happily out of the cold room.

My bro was outside, waiting for me and said, "Was she good with needles?"... I said, "She's ok". I realised that I'm a little less frightened each time I go for a bloodtest... perhaps, one day, my knees will not buckle anymore, and the past memory? Well, it'll soon be there for good --> the past. So, good ol' bro decided to buy his girlie and me a nice Hong Kong Dim Sum for being good girls and not make a fuss over the bloodtest!!! haha! How apt! The food was yummy, and serves as a good reward for what I went through that morning ... hehe!