Take that bit between your teeth...

...and just move forward, like I always do to face up many situations in life. May it we'll be a challenge or something that you know will snow ball to a different direction if you doing anything to rein it in.

Too many times I hear of reasons made up by dwellers to not move forward from situations, digging themselves deeper into the pit of despair. A despair in refusing to be courageous or simply became faithless and hopeless hindering them from moving forward. Take control...as it is the best way in carving as much the path you want to take rather than being taken for a ride, or on to someone else's ride.

You will see what I mean, and why I take this stance...

I had a bit of a sinister twist in life before. A suspicious growth that I pondered over at one point of my life. Daily checks didn't ease my mind, and I documented the evident changes. I took notes, and had catharsis with my sister and husband. Soon after, I made a courageous decision as talking ain't going to cut it. I saw a GP and verbalised my suspicions and pushed for tests to be done via referrals and to specialists and surgeons.

True enough, it is a potential terminal illness. Afraid I was, and shattered by the diagnosis. I was given options, and a decision must be made. My sister was the first I broke the news to, and then my husband, who couldn't keep it down well.

A discovery of such dashed my hopes of ever being a mother. It is an instant squelch to my youth and dreams. I grieved for my unborn children for a day whilst handling my husband's grief manifesting in gradual bursts of denials, growing by the minute.

I knew it's going to be a journey. My journey to organise, in which I did. From diagnosis to operations, and from treatments to post-treatment follow-ups I documented and made appointments. I organised my husband to accompany me, and made sure he had his father to support him. I multitasked.

Whilst in the midst of juggling illness, I decided that I have to mange how others react towards me. I found that how I react has a domino effect on how they react. I allowed grief to wash over me, as in the course of treatment, so strong are the drugs that I'm living outside of my body, physically and mentally. What a life changing experience.

I received in many forms of emotions ranging from worries to denial that manifests in rejection, anger, discomfort, and fighting off the cloud of depression that hung around like a bad smell, I kept moving forward. I know I had to have my bit of control that I'm still contributing to the workforce and the society. A different bit to put myself to good functional use.

Dad's 80th birthday celebration was looming in the horizon then, and I made that my celebration too - as the end of my treatment. It all panned out well, though I didn't look my best. Looks was secondary anyway. So glad I took that bit between my teeth to wade through to this day.