Passing on

The year 2007 had carted off two of my father's siblings, both claimed by cancer. Another Aunt now sufferened a stroke and is left for time as she lies in a coma. This has been a harsh year for my father and his siblings. The slap of reality is that they are too, in line for the unavoidable and unpredictable fate - death.

Aggie sent me the web pictures for Uncle Cheong's funeral more than a month ago, and I have refused to open it... in fear of being terribly depressed upon viewing. Aggie has been prodding me to look at it and I honestly told her of my fears. The weeks passed me by, and I finally found the courage revisit the email again to look at the pictures. True enough, eventhough enough time has passed, I still felt as sad as I first heard of the sad news. I couldn't stop the hot tears from pooling in my eyes.

I see Papa in the pictures - he played the role of pinning the symbol of mourning onto Uncle Cheong's children and grandchildren's sleeves. It was a really sad sight, and I know it must have torn Papa's heart to pieces. One of the pictures even caught Papa crying, and another one of Khin Ko Ko crying, followed by one of Heung Ko Ko crying as well. It is moments of such, where you see grown men cry.

I see all the women - my Aunts, my mother, my cousins, my nephews and nieces... all of them stood by their husbands, siblings and children... all gathered in mourning. It is a time where everyone's at peace where grudges and disagreements were set aside.

I see all the ready-made tombs that are awaiting for the rest of my father's siblings and spouses to eventually fill up, inclusive of my very own parents' too... knowing this, I broke down all over again like I first heard my father informing me that he had the tombs for mother & himself made so that all of us as his children, will not have to worry about where to bury them when the time comes. Just like that, they are prepared for death, and they've chosen their physical resting place. There'll be a day in the future that I will be there too to bury my parents too.

I've yet to stop crying whenever I think of my parents' future death, as I feel that it will be very hard for me to accept that day. I remind myself that Jesus will be by their side when the day comes, and death on earth is not the final death till the second coming of Christ.

I will miss Uncle Cheong... Aunt Fung... as I have fond memories of them. Uncle Cheong, over the years had fought hard to survive colon cancer. He did well as he survived more than 5 years. Being the middle child amongst 10 siblings, Uncle Cheong was very bitter when he was diagnosed of cancer but by God's Grace, all signs of cancer were rid of after rounds of chemotherapy. When his cancer relapsed after a couple of years, he was even more embittered to the point of being unconsolable. He questioned God, questioned even his loved ones and siblings, he even resolved to questioning anyone he could get hold of "WHY ME?"... He didn't want to be the first sibling to go, afterall he's not even the oldest, and his time should not come yet. He was just not ready.

Soon after, Aunt Fung was diagnosed of acute Leukemia, just like that, overnight. Leukemia came with a big bang, and the Yong family relived the days of Grandpa's sufferings - he had Leukemia too. Aunt Fung was less fortunate in comparison to Uncle Cheong, she didn't make it past the 10 month mark. Uncle Cheong cried bitterly when Aunt Fung died as he felt he was the one who made that drastic wish that he doesn't want to be the first to go, instead, his youngest sister took his place as the first sibling to go.

I remember saying to Uncle Muk Yaw that Aunt Fung no longer feels pain, as she's with Jesus now. Likewise, I said of the same to Aunt Len Tshin, that Uncle Cheong is with Jesus. Still, easier said than done, we are flawed humans who are attached to the physical presence of our lived ones. However, by faith and the Grace of God, we should let go and pass our loved ones on to Jesus.

The nights where both my Aunt and Uncle died, I prayed hard for God's intercession, that both of them will be forgiven for anything/whatever that they've done to possibly be unpleasing to God will be forgiven, and they'll lie in the arms of Jesus.

Because of Jesus's resurrection, I know that the physical Death is not the end. As our flesh grows older, our souls are renewed in Christ as long as we believe and have faith to live by God's Will. With this, I'd like to to say this to whoever who's reading now - "As believers of Christ, we know that when the physical body passes on, our souls will be liberated to join Jesus, where eternal life begins."

Goodbye, Aunt Fung and Uncle Cheong, I will see you one day.