Angie's blog: June 2004

To gym or not to gym...

"We can give you a really good deal... if you sign up by the end of the month..." and bla bla bla. Gym reps from fitnessfirst are as just as pushy & pesty as those Insurance agents and Multi-level-marketing folks when it comes to business - I'm sick and tired of them!.

The latest deal offered to me now is part of the Maxis corporate deal, which was better than the IBM one which was offered to me yesterday. I'm two minds about this whole thing, and it seems like the reps are trying to undercut each other all the time. I have 3 reps calling me (one from uptown, and another from KLCC and one more from God-knows-where!).

I already have a lifetime gym membership with martial allied, so... do I need another one? hmmm? So... to gym or not to gym afterall I'm already doing my regular walks at bukit kiara reserved forest and a swim at riana green? Hmmm...?

Where did all that love go?

My car tires screeched as I turned at a sharp bend into the driveway of a restaurant today to pick up a male friend who was stranded by his wife. Yup, last minute calls of such: "Where are you, Angela? Can you do me a favour?" *Sigh* Same old, same old... and I made it to the restaurant in just 15 mins from a usual 25 mins from work. This is not beginning to sound good, "Angie to the rescue"... is beginning to rhyme with "Lassie to the rescue"... snap yer fingers and I'll run to rescue... geez.

This time is almost the worst ever... both the hubby (Y)& wifey (J)went out for a nice lunch together on their day off from work, but ended up having one of the most bitter quarrels ever. When I arrived at the restaurant, I thought Y was about to have a heart attack the moment he got into the car (I swear I've never seen a man so angry before... his hand on his heart and he was breathing like he ran a marathon!).

According to him, they had a major mouth war in the restaurant which was sparked from a simple topic - picking a name for their coming baby... (J's well into her 3rd month pregnancy now)... which led to many other issues of this and that. At one point, she stood up, grabbed the car keys and ran out crying and sped off in the car leaving him in the restaurant. While Y was telling me all these, his phone kept ringing, and I could see that it was J calling and he refused to pick it up. Seems like J's moving out tonight to a hotel, and will be dumping their daughter to her mother's place, while Y's going to pack up all her stuff from the house and place it at the road side because the house is his and he doesn't want her in the house anymore! Tomorrow they'll both be seeing a lawyer!!! Geez! How could this be? Why so harsh and reactive? Both these persons are adults and approaching their mid 30s!

I kept thinking "Where did all that love go?". Yup, and amongst my friends and myself, we've always said this is a marriage made in heaven (but what has gone wrong after 10 years?). They were so in love, and we've always admired them (role models, I'd say!). They are about the prettiest couple that you'll ever lay eyes on, and a beautiful 4-year-old to complete the pretty picture... and another baby coming along soon. I just can't figure out how could things be so bitter despite all these?

I was silent most of the time while I was driving Y back to his house. When I reached the house, his gate was wide opened and the car was in the garage. In the car, I could see J was slouched over the steering wheel, sobbing her eyes out with both hands in her hair! Y saw that too, but he said something really harsh about her crying... and how immuned he is to her tears... and he refused to go in and asked me to drive elsewhere, but I asked him to go home and rest as I need to work. I tried to advise him, "Please don't say anything when you are angry, if she can't be calm, you'll have to take lead to be the calm one. Too many hurtful things have been said today, and both of you might live to regret them later... so calm down and take a good rest... talk again when you have both calmed down". He said, "It's easier said than done, Angela, you're single, so stay that way. You won't understand what I'm going through. This marriage is over". I said, "Where did all the love go?", and he replied bitterly, "What love?"... and with that, he opened the car door and left and made a sign that he'll call later. He walked past the car and totally ignored her (she's still in the car) in the garage and went into the house, and I sped off ... thinking whether I should get down and comfort her... but felt that it's Y's & J's job to handle and deal with the marriage at a more mature level. So, I chose to drive off - just to stay away from all these - so mixed up!

To tell the truth, I'm shaken by today's episode. Though it has nothing to do with me, but the thought of ever going through such things personally, left both my hands and feet cold. Nothing comes in a bed of roses, but having said this, I don't know if I can go through such bitterness esp. those that tugs the strings of my heart - I might end up in a nut house?

My mind kept bouncing back to the image of poor J, slouched in the car sobbing her eyes out, and needing of comfort. I don't want to be in her position, and I think of Y, I don't want to be in his position either. I know how harsh and insensitive Y can be when he's pissed off, as I've known him longer than J. Y's a good friend, but too bloody egoistic and filled with expectations for how J should be like... and he never tells the 'truth' of how he feels, but flaps around her in frustration and agitation whenever he's unhappy with things. While J is on constant confusion, which made her a little neurotic and inferior whether she's doing the right thing or not. Both are guilty of having their own sets of expectations. Ah... typical... I've seen this before, not only in my own life, but also in others. I understand both of them and their frustrations, but why aren't they understanding each other?

Each time I hear of such things, the more fear I have for taking risks for love and less faith I have for sustaining love. I'm turning more into a cynic each day... While thinking of all these, I got a little upset with how tricky life could be and how ideals could turn out to be nightmares. | ended up getting lost in my thoughts and people that I know who are in a rut with their love ones all seeped into my thoughts at the same time. I eventually lost my sense of direction on the roads too - was in a road maze for an hour and couldn't see anything familiar around me - I didn't get back to work till it was almost 2pm --> almost 2 whole hours taken off work to help friends! *Sigh* I wonder whether they will help me when I'm in trouble one day.

I'm a little depressed with all these, and went to bed the moment I got home. I've been awake for 3 hours now, and will go back to get more sleep now... say a quick prayer for them to get back together, most of all for the healing of broken hearts in this world, in this case, I hope there'll be two less broken hearts tonight. Tomorrow will be a better day... that's my only element of hope.

An impacted wisdom tooth at the lower jaw that caused the adjacent molar to decay... This is what I had more than 10 years ago - had to remove both molars and let the wisdom tooth grow as my case was a latent discovery ...

Harry Potter 3 ---> The prisoner of azkaban

A dissatisfied Hogwartian...

My 'Angela's movie day out' is dampened by the new Potter 3 movie after all the anticipation, hype and hearsay of how great a movie it'll be! I'd rate it a C+ at the most (and that's being kind, mind you!). I left the theater with a pout big enough to hang at a few cloth-hangers. Argggh... you can well-imagine how frustrated I am as I went through a few failed attempts to obtain tix for the movie due to the past two-week school holidays - stuck in jams, and only to get into the mall to join a long line (Every theater that screens the Potter 3 was child-infested!).

Now, back to the movie... In comparison to the previous Potter movies, there's a little less 'real' Harry in the pot this time. Alfonso Cuaron has 'adultified' teeny bopper Harry by downplaying his heroic wand-waving skills into some modern-day and emotional-wrecked Harry. I see Cuaron's views in turning Harry into a real-life character rather than a fantasy one. Somehow, I prefer the fantasy one instead of what Cuaron has created?

Harry, as portrayed in Potter 3 scored a red in anger-management class ( remember Harry blew up his aunt when he lost his temper?). Though Cuaron did a good job on portraying the reality of life, there's death. However, this doesn't mean that Harry has to be turned into an emotional wimp rather than a wand-waving hero! *sigh*. Moreover, profound plots in the book have been slashed out so that the movie could portray more emotional scenes... geez!

'Death' in Potter 3, is portrayed in the form of 'Dementors', which bear a close resemblance to those of J.R. Tolkien's Nasguls. Does this mean both the J.R.s have the similar perceptions of how death manifests itself? Somehow, Tolkien's Nasguls are far more convincing in Peter Jackson's imagery world in LOTR than those of Cuaron's Dementors in Potter 3.

Anyway, I still prefer the previous HP movies' plots where I have no time to blink from the beginning to the end of the movie. Harry, as portrayed in the other two movies was far more mystical and magical, and definitely more befitting of the Harry in J.R. Rowling's descriptions.

Well, so much for Harry Potter... perhaps I'll be less critical when Potter 4 is out. I'm drained at the mo - time to get some shut-eye.

Yup, this is mommy's doing - she would gather the pick of the day and place it at the shelf beside the dining table before she makes mango juice or whatever mango-ish grub out of it. Took this pix when I was home for a short holiday on 1 May 2004.

Anyone want mangoes? I took this snap shot of the mango tree at the back of the kitchen of my Sabah home.

What's so great about living in the tropics?

Hmmm... this got me thinking after hearing from my beau on him missing Malaysia, Singapore etc.

So, what's so great about living in a place where mozzies and over-bearing humid days are an abundance? Wait a minute... there are tons of advantages living in the tropics, especially Malaysia.

I'm thinking... there are hardly any extreme weathers that would keep one at home other than the monsoon rains. Even when it seems to be raining buckets, as Malaysians, we know that the wet days won't last long. The weather can be predictable to an extent. I can just grab anything to wear from my wardrobe, and not worry about putting on layers of clothes in case there's a cold front. There ain't no such thing as a cold front and a wind chill in the tropics, hehe.

Every morning, I wake up to the sunlight bursting through my windows... and it's really in a way, a paradise to be greeted by sunlight and listening to birds chirping away (at least I hear that).

The nights, oh the nights... I get occasional starry skies and gentle breeze in the evenings. Usually the weather is conducive enough for a good outdoorsey life. I know of many jogging trails, nice beaches, open air swimming pools, camping sites, and the list goes on.

In fact, living in Malaysia, you'll never go hungry again! Such a food paradise cum heaven (with many shops opened 24/7). One can choose from fine dining to just simple zinc top / umbrella shaded stalls... you can get just about the yummiest foods. You can even quench your thirst at any place, name the drink you want... ranging from liquors to liquers, pilsners to lagers. and decaf. to caffeined coffees and teas, fruit infusions to fresh juices... it's endless!

Even when you're not in the mood to dine out, there are tons of places where you can get fresh veggies, fruits and meats sold ... and most places close at 10:00p.m., even the night markets, hyper markets and marts. Not forgetting that this place is a shopping paradise - with malls everywhere, plus the city hardly sleeps. That's not so bad afterall... hmmm?

The point here is that, why are we never truly satisfied with what we have? This is a blessed 'green' country, and I should be grateful and happy with what Malaysia has to offer and enjoy things as the way they are. It took me a very long time to see these little blessings in life, but I now do see that there are drippings of joy living in the tropics... you'll just need to be appreciative of things :).

Bluest Monday ever!

Waking up drenched in sweat just to find out that the airconditioning ain't working no more is already a bad sign for the day... I can't live without an airconditioner... waahhhhh!!!! *sob*

Getting to work seemed to be good though, as there's no heavy traffic or any horrid driver cutting into my lane out of no where like any other day. Not bad... didn't have to step on emergency brakes. The day went ok, had three meetings today - one with my VP, next was the Financial Controller and another one with the dry old English Prof on curriculum. To tell the truth, all 3 meetings were no more exciting than chewing on sawdust... but work is work... and there are lots of things to do on my part to meet more deadlines.

When the mid afternoon drew near, I realised that 'the time of the month' has arrived with lots of discomfort, which seemed to get a little more painful as each minute passes by. I thought I could stand the pain when Doreen asked me if I wanted ponstan from her, and I made a joke that ponstans are a tad bit less effective than morphine. Yes, as Doreen disappeared up the flights of steps, I was hit by stronger wave of major cramps there and felt my legs tremble... my energy's going fast. I regretted at that moment by not saying 'yes' to ponstan! I gathered my remaining strength and ran skelter helter down two flights of steps, folded myself in almost two... to Dr. Molly's clinic biting my lip all the way and breaking out into cold sweat.

The moment I reached Dr. Molly's office, I slumped on the chair and instantly curled into a foetus position. Painful! The question came, "What can I do for you, Angela?" I said, "pain relievers, please." I popped two colourful tablets and lay down on the clinic bed, but the pain didn't go away... not even after 20 minutes! Dr. Molly checked on me again and told me that she's going to give me a jab... which I took obediently. In less than 5 minutes, I'm up and about again! Said my grateful little thank-yous and bopped out of the clinic.

Ah... what a day... and me now... writing this... I'm all ok at the mo, and cooking soupie with lots of chicken in it ... yums... I believe in the goodness of chix soup.... maybe my monday ain't so blue afterall.

(L-R) Me, Lai Lai, Doreen, Anderson and Kai _ Taken @ a Beach Bar in Damai Laut (Swiss Garden)_12June04

Angie the beach-whale @ the Damai Laut Beach :).

A sinful, sinful weekend lol

Yup, I went off to a Christian conference organised by the B & P ministry but didn't end up going to most of it's praise and worship sessions nor it's messages. However, I was on time for every meal session and truly maximised my gluttony.

I shared the room with two other girlies from work, and together we absconded most of the events. It wasn't that I didn't want to attend the sessions arranged for us, however, I didn't feel too comfortable with the way things were conducted... the message and testimonies were mainly on the business successes of the B & P members - so money-oriented. I didn't like it one bit.

We were the most obedient on the first day, the welcome session had us 3 drooling over this really good looking Kiwi speaker (he looks like a football star!) till he started sharing about his wife and kids - we got totally turned off - hehehe. However, he was nice enough to give a prayer of blessing to both Lai Lai and myself. Whoah... upclose and personal... so cute looking! But, hey... we're both there for the prayers not to look at him! haha! Anyway, we were good, we bowed our heads and prayed together said our little thank yous after the prayer and left without looking back - we were actually not interested at all?! I think that was God working through us, and totally not tempting us at all! lol

Anyway, we stayed throughout the worship session, and then 50% of the message for the night... and after that... we became restless... 3 of us hatched a little plan by not re-entering the room in 3s again. So, I was sent to go in and pack up and then go back to the room, while my roomies left the hall first and were waiting for me outside... I picked up Doreen's new Bible (yup bright yellow Good news version and a gift from her beloved bossie!) and stuff... and I thought Lai Lai didn't take her stuff across the table. So, I steathily crossed over here and there trying to make a really quiet departure from the hall. I took this nice-looking Bible across me that has a cover zipper and lots of little notes and a pen - stuffed everything inside and zipped it up... and tucked it under my arm, thinking that it was Lai Lai's... though I did notice the lady who sat beside Lai Lai kept looking at what I was doing...with her eyes growing bigger by the minute... I thought she was just being nosy, so I ignored her. I was satisfied that I've done a good job by packing everything up, and took one last look and went 'oops... almost forgot Doreen's menthos sweets'. Finally, I slowly stood up, and even pushed the chair back without a sound, and no one turned around except the same irritating lady who's eyes are rounder than saucers by now. I looked at her blankly this time, wondering what does she want... and she pointed to my arm and mimed "That's mine" ... I was so embarassed... and all of a sudden, everyone at the table looked at me wondering what was going on!!! HAHAHA! I was in the spotlight... errr... I mimed a 'Sorry' followed with lots of smiles in my embarassment... and quickly returned the stuff to her (good thing she is very forgiving too, afterall it was a mistake and nobody steals Bibles!). So much for wanting a quiet exit, I made a loud one instead... as everyone on the round table was looking at me with curious eyes . Oh well, that's life... don't we all make little blunders in life? When I got out of the hall, I related the little incident to the girls, and they had a good laugh over my silliness. Poor me!

Morning time was supposedly our 'quiet time' in where all the 3 of us were required to pray and share with another member of our focus group. That's us, we're the 'cherry blossom' girls... and it's obvious if 3 young women are missing in the group of 10. I think I was a tad bit too direct with the lady who woke us up for the quiet times.... the first line she had for us after we introduced our names were, "I was told all of you are not Christians"... duh? That got me ticked off... here, we have a stranger, trying to get a glimpse into our lives and checking our 'Christian lineage' ... plus our knowledge of Christiandom. I was turned off by the rest of the line of questioning there, really! I don't even dare to ask how my other girlfriend, who is a non-Christian, felt... Hmmmpf! So, there I went, straight to the point of not wanting to be part of the 'quiet time' group, as I believe quiet times are to be spent by yourself or with someone you're comfortable with... I was curt in some ways, and that probably made the lady feel that all the 3 of us are heathens! lol!! Err... probably just me, aye? Nevertheless, she went on and on about the story of 'man & God'... and I quipped in from time to time to shorten what she wants to say. Later on, I excused 'us' from the 'quiet time' as we wanted to go for our morning swim at the pool.

However, who am I to complain? I paid a subsidised rate for the weekend where the package includes food, transportation and lodging. Yums... the food was really good, and we were just a good 100 feets' walk from the beach side. All the 3 of us were totally spoilt over the weekend, and we even laid out on the beach and got ourselves a little tan, plus a jacuzzi and sauna session! Nice, nice, nice!

I had a splitting headache after my beach-whale session with Doreen that morning... and missed out on the beach games ... but joined the girls for a beer (I didn't have one, they did!). Anyway... I wish I had a sip of that golden liquid, it looked so tempting ... but the thought of having a recurring headache made me stay away from all that gold that 'glitters'... hehe.

*Yawn*... ok... I need a catnap now... completely tired out from the long ride back to Cheras, and then me driving home to PJ to only get stuck in the jam for another freaking hour... hmmm... so much for my weekend!

Me in Sari!

Kuchh kuchh hota hai...

I kya karuu.n haa'e, kuchh kuchh hota hai ... that's how the song trails off in the hindi movie, lol! Literally means "What shall I do? Something happens (in my heart)" - in English.

Anyway, I'm NOT referring to a man in regards to the song...it was my infatuation with a pretty pink & gold gossamer-like silk sari... 8 years ago!! I spent just as many years trying to search for the right choli (a short blouse worn under the sari) to go with it!

This song goes back to my old work place... I was one of the 'maidens' in a sketch about 3 years ago when I had to don on a sari and dance & sing to the song. It was really fun, and we did that at the students' annual ball where the top & middle management had to come up with a sketch to entertain the students! In a team of 12 persons, we decided to play the ever-famous Sha Rukh Khan's kuchh kuchh hota hai movie / song and make a spoof out of it!

Well, that's the only 'sari' history I have till now. Many thanks to my East Indian boss's (Shanker) wedding ceremony on 6th June 2004, I resumed with my search for the choli . As one of the usherers for the night, I wanted to blend into the culture and surroundings, which gave me a reason to dress up like a traditional 'Indian'... yup, complete with the bindi (sticker on the forehead), bangles, nose pin, sindoor sticker (a dot or any other decorative piece to decorate the forehead), matching gold necklace & earrings, and a pair of Indian gold sandals!

The kuchh kuchh hota hai song was playing in my mind when I tagged along with Priya & Ernie all the way to Klang, a godforsaken jin bertendang (genie's haven) place to shop for the required knick knacks to go with the occassion. Alas, I still couldn't find the right choli and decided to have one tailor-made. I hopped from one shop to the next requesting to have rolls and rolls of champagne-gold material to be brought out - what a wonderful variety to choose from!

So, I went to this tailor who's an Indian nationale - can't speak a word of English or Bahasa Malaysia... and I couldn't understand a word of Tamil! It's a good thing that Priya was around to tell him what I want to do and so forth. So, everything's settled now :).

Hmmm.... I'll need Priya's mom to help me to 'tie' the sari for me before I go to Shanker's wedding - so looking forward to that :).

This is a very good friend of mine, Zorah. I took this pix of her some time in August 2003 when we were having an afternoon tea at 'Struddle' in Sri Hartamas, KL.